Woman-to-Man Pedestaled Courtship Lexicon (W2MPCL)

[RD: This wordpress post is no longer active, and its contents were transferred to wordpress page W2MPCL on 12 December 2012.]

This is my lexicon of terminology used by liberated woman to communicate to prospective male suckers their irrational expectations and feeeeelings. This post, originally published 9 December 2012, is subject to modification to develop and perfect the content to my liking. Suggestions on lexicon changes may be made in the comment section below. I hope this dictionary will be useful to let other frustrated Western men know they are not alone, give us a laugh, and perhaps advance culture to our liking for a change. How absurd must orthodoxy become before a man will trust himself? Enjoy, and cherchez la femme.

—‘Reality’ Doug, 9 December 2012

All Men, Prove Not the Same – Prove my idiocy is correct, please.
Booty Calls, I Can Get That at the Bar – My sex is prohibitively expensive unless you meet me at the bar when I break down to get my needs met once or twice a year because I’m a hamster fed on media corn.
Booty Calls, Not Looking For – Been there; done that; finds me too easily.
Decent Guy, I Just Want – I lowered my standards and now you need only have one of the following: an Olympic gold medal, a private jet, fame, political connections.
Drama, No – I have a pet hamster one million years old, so do things my precultural way proven by the test of time.
Entertain Me – My last boyfriend was my dancing monkey, but my vibrator was more fun, so give me the three-ring circus if you want the haggard leftovers of this ride, and also be like totally hilarious, literally.
Independent – Cashing in on unnatural political preference.
Keep It Real – Indulge me; you’re the bitch, mister.
Keep Walking – I owe you nothing for suffering my faux independence.
Liars, Sick Of – I crush honest men with my sociopolitical power, and I’m sick of no one left but men pretending to be honest because I can’t honestly use them and truly express my feeeeeelings.
Love Me For Me – Love me in unassailable absolute terms for the relative position I deserve from someone who takes care of everything while I take the credit.
Must Make Me Laugh – I’m secretly depressed; fix it.
My Life is Perfect and I Just Need Someone To Share It With – My logic is inscrutable so obey.
My World, My Kids Are – Taking applications for my personal slave ’cause raising kids as a single mom is hard even with unearned privileges.
*New People, Love to Meet – Entertain me until the novelty wears off.
One, Looking For The – I deserve the alpha of all of humanity because we are all one collective and I’m your special princess, but not for you personally, just alpha.
Real Men, Where Are The? – I fought hard to fashion rank-and-file society into my pedestal, making me a real woman, so why can’t I find a man of flesh and blood as good as Daddy State?
*Settle for Less, I Won’t – I am Goddess with a capital ‘G’, and my $%!& don’t stink.
Single Mom with Full-Time Job and Going to School – Devout slave, unavailable and here to tease your heart and penis to pretend I have a life.
Someone Who Knows What He Wants – Someone dumb enough to want me on my impossible terms as much as I do.
Strong – Determined to keep leveraging political preference, the consequences be damned.
*Strong Enough To Be My Man – Wanted: One superhuman bondsman to not break under maximum load of this she-child’s desires.
Surprise Me – Have unusually great wealth and lavish it and your time on me.
True Love – Duty and service will not be motivators of my partnership with you, that’s work.
Whore, I’m Not A – I was a whore to birth three kids by two fathers by age 22, but I’ve learned from my mistakes and you can too, for the rest of our lives together.

* – Recent modification.

Lexicon last updated: 11 December 2012.

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About ‘Reality’ Doug

I'm feed up with herd people, so civil and uncivilized, these feckless barbarians with manicures. Where is Galt's Gulch? and where are the people to go there? Who am I? Who is John Galt?
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