WARNING: Attempting to improve your fitness is dangerous like life itself. Believe or use the information herein at your own risk. I disclaim having certified or reliable expertise in nutrition and in fitness, yet I have my life to live all the same. Trial lawyers please fuck yourselves. Everyone else, see a fucking doctor if you need to see a fucking doctor, and I don’t know if you should. I know we have an economy because we must economize, but trial lawyers don’t reliably win legal battles applying unvarnished truth or optimizing mortal welfare with economy, now do they? With Obamacare surely everyone will be able to afford comprehensive health care and talking pink ponies that handle all the paperless paperwork because women voter’s care and are making a difference.
Fitness is Individually Evolutionary
Evolution is the interpretive framework of EVERYTHING. It is more than simply the key via evolutionary psychology to (feminine) social skills generally and vaginal harvest especially. I have used evolution to precisely and exclusively identify morality, as documented in my essay Proving Morality. I will apply evolution to describe the correct approach to fitness in this post.
Why evolution? I’ll tell you why, grasshopper. Life is a process: it’s more verb than noun. Your life is change incarnate. The rules of that change are evolution. Evolution relies on the law of conservation to limit resources and on serendipitous replicating units using limited resources and reproducing themselves with a nearly infallible reliability. Actually, evolution relies on might makes right. Evolution creates mighty designs and prunes everything else. It is instead the case that natural process relies on evolution for its winning existence. Your life relies on evolution to have the might to make it right for continued existence. Evolutionary process is your best friend and your worst enemy, depending on your degree of harmony with it. Evolution is essentially God, perhaps by proxy.
Your palate is your dietary taste. Little kids in India like spicy foods, probably more than most adults in many other places. How is that possible? They got used to it little by little before they could remember how bad it was, at least that is a strong possibility. It could be Indians are genetically disposed to eat spicy food without a problem, but still, how did that happen? Evolution. One way or another, our palates are the product of evolution. With children growing up where their parents did not with modern transportation, we observe palates are largely determined by biologic evolution of only one individual going back only years. Your palate has been shaped gradually over time, and to change it anew will require another gradual process.
Americans, generally fat and lazy, like to think of a diet as a temporary unpleasantness. Wrong! Here’s another instance of deceptive vocabulary, of bad assumption taken for granted. A diet is what you eat, period. Will power alone does not work for fitness. Why? Because the mind and the body are connected. (Incidentally, yoga means union and refers to the union of mind and body, and I recommend yoga as exercise but not religion.) The mind is a psychological reality build on the physical reality of the brain but also the body as a whole. Biochemistry of hormones and what not, with whatever other relevant physiological aspects of physical state determine a person’s will power. It is naive to expect will power to effect a sharp change to the body as if will power of the mind were some independent causal agency fit to direct physical reality by whim. Will power is surprisingly effective as a biologically based habit, precisely when you don’t exactly need it. Will power need not be nefariously defined in your mind. Don’t make this a first-the-chicken-or-first-the-egg problem. That causes paralysis by analysis. Let’s start at the beginning of our consideration.
Fitness boils down to diet, exercise, and sleep. Just working out is different than training. Training has a goal in the future targeted by compound behavior (over time), like compound interest targets a substantial profit. The fiat money of the Nu Wurld Odor nudges the behavior of society as a whole. Over the long run, great change has happened. The right way to approach fitness is to nudge yourself into new behaviors that lead to a higher quality of fitness and life. You have many demands on your existence, and sometimes physical fitness is not the priority of the moment, but you can consistently make it a priority in some small but frequent way.
Over the last few years, I have been experimenting with my fitness habits, and I will share the specifics of that experience in the hope it will help you. If you are fat, the pounds of fat that make you truly fat will come off easily. The fitter you get, the harder it is to improve. You will plateau. The body becomes efficient. Therefore, you are essentially at war or in friendly competition with your biochemistry. It counters every move you make. What used to be an effective fitness regime fades to mediocrity and then worse given enough time, which won’t likely happen since life is demanding. Right now your Western nation (if you have one) has faded well past mediocrity and a change of behavior is unavoidably necessary, not that a good one to restore the body politic must necessarily happen. It might be useful to alternate between training aimed at fat reduction and training for muscle growth. I don’t exactly know, but I do know it’s the planning not the plan, so be the man of your life, or get a good man. Oh, that’s right. Ladies, we don’t own you; we either get your milk for free or else we don’t, as you see fit, so man up with your man jaws held high.
If you are a newbie to getting fit, I recommend you gradually change your lifestyle in three cumulatively sequenced activities: (1) Reduce and mostly master sugar intake, (2) Add and manage physical activity, and (3) Experiment and train with diet modifications of volume, content, and timing. I said gradually. You must internalize the changes before they mean anything, just like with Game. I will now detail each activity. Internalize at your own pace. Consistent attention is the key to efforts and results. The tortoise beats the hare.
Fat does not make you fat; sugar makes you fat.
Reducing sugar consumption is easy with evolution. Bear in mind Ph.D.’s are undoubtedly paid handsomely to engineer cheap, addictive food so you can’t eat just one for their employers’ bottom line. The fatter you are, the fatter are the profits of the human fed industry, essentially Big Ag. I have little sympathy for the fatties because they have screwed me over socially like most everybody and only natural selection can cure my ills. Fatties beat up and exhaust themselves emotionally, I would guess. They are losers at fitness and in stereotypic reputation, and they have scientifically determined characteristic personality traits. I’m a loser financially. I admit it, but I don’t beat myself up emotionally. Neither should you. How can you be good for you or me if you are not good for yourself? Answer: Domestication. But I digress.
Just follow this simple exercise of positive reinforcement, and let behavioral conditioning work for you for once, and at YOUR command. See the full part of the glass of your dietary habits, and forget about the empty part. Seize every small victory you can, and don’t give a damn about the defeats. It’s really that simple. When you are about to munch down on that cheese cake, hold the fork in your hand, relax, and count to 5, just five little seconds, and have that be your victory. Forgo as many final sips of soda as you can comfortably manage. Toward the end of an eating session, tell yourself with your own voice in your own head, “This is the last bite.” If it’s not your last bite, so what, repeat until it is. With habitual thoughtfulness and success, your biochemistry and ‘will power’ will change to fit your behavior, which will change your biochemistry, which will change your behavior, in a feedback looped sequence of easy little changes.
Not surprisingly, your ‘will power’ to eat lots of sugary garbage will diminish. Success breeds success. Five seconds of delayed gratification becomes 10 seconds, 20 seconds, then minutes, then hours. Time between meals will increase. Volume of sugar will decrease. Your blood sugar spikes and subsequent cravings will lessen. The self-administered behavior modification program of sugar reduction victories (SABMP-SRV) will take about three months to beat the sugar addiction.
Others don’t want to lose relative status to you. There will be naysayers, including so-called friends and family. You don’t need to announce your SRV program, just do it. If people do criticize the fundamental merits of your efforts, use it as evidence you are on the right track, because that’s the scary truth they don’t want to face by reflection. It might be useful to let your circle of friends evolve too.
Once you get on a reduced sugar roll, the fat will come off quickly and easily until you reach homeostasis at a lower fat level. I dropped from 170 pounds to about 164 and languished there for about a year, trying to milk it for more, but nothing doing. It seems like a small drop in weight, but it made a big difference in the steepest overhang angle of my gut. When it was hanging down, as in angling below horizontal in honor of gravity, that’s when I decided I had to stop eating stupid. I don’t go stupid the other way because a diet is not temporary. Eventually, I was ready to employ exercise to improve my physique.
Part two in two days, gentle reader.
—‘Reality’ Doug, 17 June 2013