Profits Uber Alles

You have no property rights, starting with the money you use. Therefore, you have no economic rights and are structurally underemployed or unemployed. You may not survey customer demand unless you first start your business and you can’t start a business unless you pay hundreds or thousands of USD in government fees.

You sit there, as I, wondering what to do. They have you by the balls. Our man Bruce Jenner, a victim of virulent feminism, has decided to hand his over rather than continue with the pain of not being in the privileged female class. If you don’t have the right stuff to be a successful shit bureaucrat, your best bet is to be a gruntrepreneur only risking his time. You could sell ebooks or apps through establishment channels as a ‘junior partner’. And who doesn’t have that idea these days?

Add to your nuevo freedom choices professional Uber driver if you actually have or can afford to get a car. Don’t count on those property rights, but if you already have a car and there is no cost unless you get paid over your costs for sure, why not?

The morons think that the Uber business model is innovative, but it’s rather parochial, like the reverse auction of Jitney drivers have been that ‘innovative’ for what? a century? The money cartel is the innovative business model.

Sometime after Henry Ford made cars that the middle class could afford, politicians and oligarchs thought it would be a good idea to license taxi drivers to ‘keep excessive traffic off the roads’ or whatever bullshit. Now comes Uber to overthrow the establishment? If I advertise on craigslist to help grandma get her groceries, I’d get fined, maybe arrested.

I smelled a rat in the Uber business. Didn’t take long to identify it.

This from “Uber Raises $1.6 Billion in Financing From Goldman Sachs” from ABC news and dated 21 January 2015:

Goldman Sachs spokeswoman Andrea Raphael says the financing comes in the form of a bond that can later be converted into stock when Uber goes public. Goldman says the deal completed a few days ago is one of the largest private convertible debt offerings on record. It was earlier reported by Bloomberg News.

But that is late to the party. There must be some earlier stench. According to Forbes article “Meet the Uber Rich” by Erin Griffith and dated 5 June 2014, the original ‘angel’ investors stand to make 2000x their investments when Uber goes public.

That means even a tiny little $20,000 angel investment is now worth around $40 million. Even investors from the $3.5 billion round have now almost quintupled their money in less than a year.

Now what happens if and when Wall Street drops legal protection of Uber’s business model after the IPO? Will Uber competitors be prevented? Will private ownership of cars be made effectively illegal like mercury-free incandescent light bulbs?

So who has the early connections? According the Forbes: Mitch Kapor, Chriss Sacca, Naval Revikant, Babak Nivi, Alfred Lin, Cyan and Scott Banister, Shawn Fanning, Jason Calacanis, Mike Walsh, Oren Michels, Josh Spear, Scott Belsky, Matt Ocko, Zachary Bogue, David Sacks, Jeremy Stoppelman, Chris Hollod, Gary Vaynerchuk, Bobby Yazdani, Troy Carter (former manager of Lady Gaga), Kevin Hartz, Dror Berman, Adam Leber (manager of Britney Spears), Robin Sloan Bechtel (‘works with musicians on digital strategy’), and Khaled Helioui.

And don’t forget:

Update: Nihal Mehta has been removed from this list. Prior to publication, Mehta had confirmed to Fortune had he had made an angel investment in Uber, but later revealed the investment was actually through another individual.

All those people are so much smarter than you.

David Sacks had a birthday party and the theme was ‘Let them eat cake’. Get it? Probably just a coincidence that the French still insist that all French get government dole.

So if you like want to get in touch with your like feeelzingz, like literally see the video for the drama of the smart courtesans of the mostest smart people (no final period in URL): We like fund the court jesters by like getting out of their way for ‘social justice’ per the gubbermint force of taxation and bullets. Patriarchy is like sooooo totally evil ‘n stuff.

—‘Reality’ Doug, 31 January 2015

About ‘Reality’ Doug

I'm feed up with herd people, so civil and uncivilized, these feckless barbarians with manicures. Where is Galt's Gulch? and where are the people to go there? Who am I? Who is John Galt?
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