In my last post, “Cutting Edge Body Language Study,” I promised, “I will teach you two techniques that together will give you presence that escalates.” This is it. You will also get presence that calms.
I did not say get laid, but his should get you closer. I think getting laid in the leading Western nations is pretty damn hard for all but a fraction of a percent of men. Apparently, Matt Forney is closer to being a PUA than I, and I never saw that one coming. I’m still researching modern seduction when I can. That’s what Keirsey Temperament Architects do. We like and need theory, for good or bad.
I’ve come to the realization that there are social skills and there is social leverage. The less leverage you have, the more seduction skills you will need to get laid. Women are so primitively hypergamous with growing latitude that you will increasingly need both. But presence, that I have improved to where I don’t feel awkward with prolonged face-to-face exposure to totally noncommunicative strangers that for all I know could at any moment communicate some social gesture and provide a basis for my social calibration. First some theory on the utility of presence to put the specific calibration techniques in perspective.
Women are creatures of relative social status. The above-the-animals elevation potential of their social norms is zero: in my terms the socio-ecological gravity of their packism is acultural, wealthless animalism. For women, what gets attention is what’s important. If you evade eye contact, if you turn away, that is self-effacing attention that she ideates makes her better than you. Conversely, if you lock eyes, if you focus on her without having per her outlook sufficient rank, better yet attraction, that is also attention that she ideates makes her better than you. Behavior modification is attention. It seems like an impossible catch-22, but it’s not.
Calibration is the key, but the question is then: how to give less and possibly zero attention even by deferential behavior? This one is really easy to overthink. If you were drunk, you would have no choice but to not give a fuck, and your body language would show it. In a month or two, you will be doing that stone cold sober (unless you’re not, but that’s not my fault).
This one is too easy, but don’t underestimate it! The distance you choose is crucial. Initially, you must read your target and determine in real time when to stop getting closer. Respect her emotions as clues to her responsiveness. You are sexually needy; she is emotionally needy. Husbandry of her emotions is what she instinctively wants, especially in a relationship.
That’s not to say to make her comfortable exactly, unless you mean according to her lizard brain that wants a dominant man she respects. Too much comfort (as men understand the idea) makes her uncomfortable, but for this post you either get what I mean by that or you don’t.
Find the distance sweet spot, and read when it changes so that you ‘just know’ what to do.
As a reminder, reading requires practice. I suggest sitting on a bench near substantial foot traffic and making up bios to yourself on the characters that walk by. The more plausible your non-trivial descriptions become, the closer you are to reading sheeple.
Ocular Focus Calibration
This is the core idea of this post. The problem with being aloof is publicizing it. Women have very short attention spans, and if you are not being seen, you aren’t relevant to women.
With your eyes, learn to focus beyond people. Practice focusing at some arbitrary distance beyond as you meditate. Practice focusing beyond something dead center in your vision, but also something just off center. The natural tendency is to center what is near center, but doing that is giving attention.
Focus calibration gets more complicated than either full focus or no focus. It has a continuum throughout. For your first attempts at partial focus, try 50%. It is a subjective measure that will improve with skill. The idea is to at all be able to mix eye attention with eye inattention at the same time. Precision can come later.
You can practice trying to look past yourself in the mirror. Not easy, but worth doing a little here and a little there. You hardly need to interrupt your day. Meditation with eye focus requires a block of time, however much. No need to overthink this either.
I’m not sure what happens with the facial expression, but I suspect the face beyond the eyes is altered, not just the pupils.
Pregnant Choice Presence
You know that to open a target or set you might flash your eyes like headlights to get attention. You know that with attraction or at least some comfort to show a hint of the O-face and get her comfortable with the ideation of you as a sex partner.
You may have noticed women are getting more and more jaded and egotistical (and probably frustrated). You need to be aloof but demonstratively to show that you have value and a quality life without her. Don’t be too eager with your attention. Sure, you can cold open, no body language read or communication, but if you don’t get commensurate positive attention back, you need to withdraw your attention at reactionary speed (the operating speed of animals). Now you can, like she never mattered to you in the first place. lulzllulz Women change their behavior to a revised past. A man can’t compete at the packism level? Please.
If your body language read gives you her attention temperature in general or for you, then you just calibrate to that in general and with your eyes. Different social situations in public places have a different energy and vibe, and sometimes individuals carry their own energy and vibe.
If I am in a cold social environment, I am not uncomfortable like I used to be. I just focus through and past people. No more: WTF do I do with my eyes? The weird thing is, cold strangers are more likely to want some sort of acknowledgment when I do that. Sheeple value what is publicly scarce regardless of intrinsic value, so keep your attention publicly scarce among the zombie crowd. Sheeple are covert cannibals and they don’t like unwelcome attention. You must have some respected frame or narrative, possibly just customary social courtesy, but you must have some recognized social template because sheeple want cohesion, safety, and choice.
With distant focal attention, you can still see the body language of those in your field of vision.
If you want to withdraw your attention to punish behavior you don’t like, now you can do that with your eyes with seemingly no effort, no fuss.
This next social technique, let’s call it a pregnant choice pause, is an application of the two calibration techniques. To escalate using presence, you must create a social question by body language. Sheeple want everything handed to them except one thing, control over what they get handed to them. They want to make the decision to themselves even if they don’t actually have a choice by the laws of nature. They follow the Pleasure Principle and think that Truth is their sacrosanct choice. Also, presence is engaging, so engage your target but allow choice. Never allow yourself to be ruined if a woman chooses to leave you or disappoint you. Have choices of your own. You can’t control what you don’t own by respected property rights.
When you approach, if you see some discomfort (the bad kind), stop getting physically closer: that is your calibrated distance for the moment. To make her feel comfortable, look through and past her to some degree, enough to get her to relax but not so far as to become to her strangely irrelevant. It would be weird if you retreat so easily or wildly calibrate from one extreme to another. If she is very put off then, yes, you would 100% look past her and appear emotionally unassailable.
Have you been practicing your meditation? Good, ’cause you’re gonna need it. Show your confidence with presence calibrated for distance and focus. Just hold it with calm or maybe that shit-eating grin. (I’m not sure why they call it that, perhaps because it’s a good show of unassailable confidence). Let her decide if she wants to engage you socially or not. You give her the out, but you don’t choose it for her. A woman’s coldness will melt when you do it right, then recalibrate your presence as necessary and communicate on the established channels of words and body language.
If you read and calibrate at reaction speed, you are one of the few men that ‘get her’. Chicks love that because they don’t get themselves. Imagine living in a man’s world like that, constantly optimizing per hypergamy while out of your natural environment. You are the solution that lives for you.
Thus concludes a four-part analysis on seductive facial expression. A comment or tweet describing you attempts at applying the ideas of this series would be informative to the rest of us. You are going to try, right?
Unplug. Side step. Ride. Rebuild. PUA is the way.
—‘Reality’ Doug, 08 October 2014